The Day Before~ Thoughts, Prayers, and Encouragement

Loved Ones~
As you can imagine, I didn't sleep well last night and don't expect to tonight either! This long journey has come to it's final large hurdle (there are other small hurdles still to come), the court date. If Micah David passes court, he is officially our son tomorrow.

Our SON. We have called him that for months but have always known, in the back of our minds, that he was not ours YET. It's amazing what a piece of paper can mean in the life of a child!

Last week I cried much for our son in Ethiopia who has spent 5 months without a mother, a father, a forever family. He has been wonderfully cared for but has not experienced the love of a mother and father since he was relinquished, hungry and small, at such a young age. If we do not pass court tomorrow, Micah David will remain in the transitional home and miss his first Christmas with is forever family. He will continue to be well cared for but will go 8 months without a mother. This thought, if I dwell on it, can bring me to despair.

Last weekend my good friend Krina's cousin was shot in Mumbai by a fundamentalist Pakistani simply for being Indian. He survived but will forever be haunted by the vision of a gunman bent on death, forever reminded by the scars on his body.

I want to scream at our God, "Why is life so hard in this world, especially for those who cannot fight for and defend themselves?"

I was reading John Piper's blog this morning, as I often do, and read the following entry. It's a reminder of the call to be salt and light as well as the importance of pushing forward even in the midst of sorrow, tragedy, and injustice.

"From one day to the next the news changes. Some hits home so close it makes you sick. Some is global and makes the heart tremble. But we press on in the work we are given to do.

How can we do this? One way is to know that we are “greatly loved.” Three times an angel tells Daniel he is “greatly loved.”

• "You are greatly loved.” (9:23)
• “O Daniel, man greatly loved.” (10:11)
• "O man greatly loved, fear not, peace be with you; be strong and of good courage.” (10:19)

Everyone who believes in Christ experiences the same:

“But God...because of the great love with which he loved us...made us alive together with Christ.” (Ephesians 2:4-5)

You are loved with “great love”—omnipotent love, omniscient love, unstoppable love, eternal love. Therefore, do not fear. Be appalled at the world, and be productive in it."

When I get scared that our court date might not be successful or that my son might remain without a family for so much longer, I try to remind myself of how deeply loved I am, with a "great love" that will prevail. The story has been written and the ending is secure. As a character, it is my job to remain in the story line, faithful and trusting in this LOVE that is rooted in grace.

Monday

Loved Ones~

We think MONDAY is the day. It's only Saturday but the nerves are in full swing. We are praying for peace and pleading that he would pass.

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not let them be afraid."

May we not be afraid of the outcome but remain faithful in trusting our God's perfect timing and vision for Micah David.

Pray hard for us!

Holding Pattern

Hey All~
There's no new news yet on Micah David passing court or travel. We are in a holding pattern just waiting for our court date. Kim is traveling this week with Devon and Chad is furiously working to finish the basement in the hopes that we pass court and travel in less than 3 weeks!

We received great photos of Micah from a few sources this week. Our favorite is of him sleeping in his bed. He looks so peaceful and we are able to really see his face. Our hearts have transitioned from adoration to NEED in respect to him. We NEED to hold him, we NEED to care for him, we NEED to be with him.

Most of all we NEED to know that he is ours, finally and forever.

This, by far, has been the darkest, worst, most stressful wait of all. Perhaps that is why you haven't really heard from us in a while! We are both trying to keep busy all the time knowing that this could be the final hurdle to bringing home our son.

So much hangs in the balance...so much we can't control. PLEASE~ PLEASE~ PRAY THAT MICAH DAVID WOULD PASS COURT!!!! We NEED to bring home our son.

Kim

How GREAT Is Our God???

Loved Ones~
I asked for prayer last night as we had gotten some MAJOR news from AWAA regarding our travel dates. We were unsure if the news was correct or a cruel mistake. So, rather than tell everyone, we waited, asked for prayer, and TOSSED and TURNED all night until we could confirm the truth with our agency. Are you ready???

If we pass court next week, WE TRAVEL DECEMBER 13-20th!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's right my friends, God worked a miracle with our paperwork and Micah David will be HOME for CHRISTMAS!!! Just reading those words brings tears to my eyes. God opened so many doors and paved the way for this to happen. There were only 2 seats left on the flight out of Addis and we got them, my mother is still able to watch Devon, Chad was able to get off of work with such short notice, my boss was gracious and let me out of school that week...the list goes on and on.

So, PRAY HARD that we pass court and that we don't go crazy with the rushed preparations and schedules. Our brains are turning to mush and we really have very little time to get it all together.

We are PRAISING God for this mighty work and GIFT!!!

Kim

PRAYER NEEDED!!

PLEASE PRAY FOR US!! Tomorrow is either going to be a wonderful day of rejoicing or another challenge to overcome and praise God for...but we REALLY want it to be good news.

I don't want to elaborate further....PRAY PRAY PRAY!!!

Going to TRY to sleep now...not likely.

Kim

Full Weekend~ Mid Atlantic Get Together

Hello All~
We had a very full weekend that I waited 2 whole days to blog about (see Stacklers and Crowells, I'm not completely addicted!) On Friday we hung out at home as a family and watched Kung Foo Panda, or as Devon calls it "Poo Poo Panda" (I tend to agree with him). It was a really nice night as a threesome.

On Saturday Chad and I dropped off little man at my parents and went walking around a philly mall for a while. Chad continually reminded me of how bad our economy is doing as evident by all of the mega sales. We looked for baby necessities (carrier, bottles, etc.) and bought a car charger for my phone (I know, random!)

We then went down and met with Amy and William Stackler and Steve and Megan Crowell for dinner at an ET coffee house. We had REALLY good coffee before they arrived (we were first), perhaps a preview of what we will get next month. We decided the coffee house wasn't the best location for dinner and proceeded to an ET restaurant for dinner. While the atmosphere left a little to be desired, the food was great (aside from William's snack Gyro ;) and the company wonderful.

We had a really nice time with the S's and C's! They are both wonderfully Godly couples with a sense of humor, both attributes we LOVE to see in friends! It was really nice to discuss adoption with people who actually know what we are talking about when we say "DTE" and "referral." I've posted a few pictures above. I took them from my blackberry so don't get your hopes up. Coincidentally I am not in any of them! (Blonde moment...)

Most of all, Chad and I realized how much the bumps and hardships of having a child in Africa that we can't see or touch has dampened our excitement for this process. We left feeling a bit rebuked (in a GOOD way) and much renewed! It's amazing how a few months can really change your perspective on the process.

While they are still waiting to meet their children via referral, we are on the front lines waiting to hold Micah David and bring him home. This is the harder, more taxing of the waits and I in particular have let it get me down. I'm not saying I'm all smiles and songs today as we missed Micah David's 6 month birthday recently, but I do feel a renewed sense of anticipation at what GOD is doing in us, for Micah David, and in Ethiopia through this process. I think we've gotten so blinded by the face of our son that we were unable to see the larger impact in the way we did before his referral.

So, thanks Stacklers and Crowells for helping us to see the beauty in the pain of this wait and for pointing us to God's faithfulness. It's always nice to be reminded of what you should already know but have momentarily forgotten.

Kim

Mid Atlantic Get Together Photos

Referrals!

YIPPEE!
Today was a wonderful day at the Yahoo Group! 3 referrals were given out including a baby girl for the Forrest family, the SWEETEST toddler girl to the Blackwell family, and a cutie pie toddler boy to the Hall family. This marks the end of a 6 WEEK DROUGHT!

Praise God for these wonderful miracle children.

There is so much love in Ethiopia!!!


Kim

UPDATE!!!

All~
Yesterday we receive a fabulous update from the Terwelliger family. We also received 4 VERY FUNNY pictures of him with his new froggy hat and a black Harley Davidson shirt. Daddy got a kick out of that! Micah David looks uncomfortable but compliant in a few. Then he just starts to WAIL! We haven't seen him with too much expression so we were ecstatic at seeing his cry face! He's a sweet heart, ya'll. His daddy and I might have a real problem on our hands with his sweet cheeks!


Isaac and Kathee also gave us a wonderful update on Micah David. I thought you all would like to hear the good news yourselves!

"Kim, your little guy is gorgeous. His face is so expressive, he is responsive and happy. We, of course, couldn't coax a smile out of him for the photos but he is a such a sweet little boy. He interacted with the presents you sent and he is just ready and waiting for you to get there. When we were there, he spent his time sitting up in a special type of seat (I've only seen them rarely in the US). It's like molded foam rubber or something but it has high sides and back so that kids who can't totally sit up by themselves don't topple over. (A Bumbo Seat) Your baby looked to be sitting in it fine. He was looking around and smiling and playing with his fingers. I hope that you can continue to bond in your hearts with the thoughts and concepts of this little guy because when you meet the reality, he is going to blow you away!

Here are just a few comments about the TH in general. I thought it might help you as you imagine where your baby is now. One is that there are a LOT of kids. The facility is not as big as I imagined and so when many of the babies are in the one "day" room, as opposed to the rooms with cribs for sleeping, it is a very full room. A lot of kids means it's noisy and fun and chaotic and busy. For the babies, it seemed there was constant visual stimuli of people moving in and out (although clearly we only saw the home when there was twelve extra adults running around!) and constant auditory stimuli of voices and laughter and car horns and a TV on in the corner.

The second comment is regarding the nannies. They are women of laughter. They laugh with each other and they laugh with the children. They banter with each other and talk and seem to get along well with each other. They look to be happy women. They coo and tickle and cuddle the children. If they are feeding or interacting with one child, they don't get annoyed or impatient with another child's interruption. They just interact with that new child as well.

The third comment is just that there looks to be a lot of love in the TH. The children are cherished and embraced. They are not left to their own devices. They are held a lot and smiled at a lot... which makes them respond to the love we offer very quickly. Of course, I can't make specific statements or guarantees of the level of care, but from what I observed in two afternoons, there is much love lavished on these kids and the nannies are wonderful women."

We feel so blessed to have this news! Our hearts are a bit heavier today as we love him even more. We really are COMPLETELY ready to bring that little peanut home, regardless of the cost, travel, etc.

Please continue to pray for Micah David. He looks wonderful in the photos. He is very dark, which we LOVE, and is starting to look squishy, which we also LOVE in a baby! We can't wait to hold him for the first time and kiss is sweet cheeks. He has the SWEETEST cheeks, ya'll!

Please also pray for us, not for patience as I don't think this word covers the emotional/spiritual/physical act of waiting for your CHILD. Please pray for ENDURANCE as we are sidelined from our own child. Help us to endure with praise and joy.

Kim

Called

I was asked recently why we chose to adopt. She said "you couldn't have your OWN children?" After I picked my jaw up off the ground and squashed the desire to rip her hair out, I replied "No, not at all. We just feel called to obey God's command and take care of the widows and the orphans." She replied "I'm glad God calls some people to this."

Ok, so I didn't reply to that because I can't change hearts. But, I wanted to quote John Piper.

"There are three types when it comes to missions. Those who go, those who give, and the disobedient."

If you have a red letter Bible, you can go through and COUNT the many times Jesus commands us to take care of the widows and orphans. You can read the great commission in RED, his COMMAND to go and spread the gospel.

It's amazing to me that anyone thinks this doesn't apply to them. We're all called, People! The question isn't "Am I called?" The question is "How will I answer?"

It's clear enough to us but perhaps not as clear for you. I would encourage each of you to search your hearts and pray about how you can give back. It doesn't have to be financially or opening your home to a child. You can give the gift of time, prayer, love! We all have these to spare.

How will you obey this command today?

Nothin' but Waitin'

Hey~
I just wanted to update you all. Nothing is happening right now. We expect our court date to be the last week in November or first 2 days in December. If we pass, Micah David will officially be ours and we will prepare to travel in January.

Until then, we are keeping busy preparing for Micah David. The nursery is coming along though I still haven't actually put the decorations on the walls. I find a reason to pack and repack Micah David's bag about 3 times a week to stare at the clothes. I wonder what he will look like with a blue outfit on! (We still have yet to receive pictures from the Terwelligers took Micah David his care package last week. Perhaps tomorrow!)

So, the wait continues. We are aware now that we are waiting for our son Micah David, not just waiting to wait. That's a really nice feeling.

Cheers to the "nicer" wait!

Kim

Reality Check

So, this family is going through a "reality check" of sorts lately. As time drags on between Micah David's referral and, well anything, we are beginning to realize our complete lack of control or even understanding. We are also feeling a bit out of sorts as a family.

On the one hand, we are IN LOVE with Micah David's pictures and the idea of him. On the other, we know we don't know him yet and so these feelings are, well, premature. Don't get me wrong, I know that God is working in our hearts to bind us all together. But, it's really wierd to LOVE something so much that you have never seen in person, touched, smelled, kissed, etc.

So often my mind whispers "Is he real?"

These feelings are so unnatural, counterintuative even. We were MADE to love this child but we can't yet. We were BLESSED with the ability to adopt him, but we are in court date/travel date limbo. After a while all of these questions pile up to, well, a big pile of questions with no answers.

So, what do we do? We get on our knees and pray that the Lord will continue to work as He has SO WELL SO FAR! We remember our stones, those reminders in our "river Jordan," this adoption.

We have done NOTHING to bring Micah David home other than fill out paperwork and write checks (many painful checks). On the other hand, God knit Micah David in his birth mother's womb while he was knitting the idea of him into our hearts. God preserved Micah David through severe malnutrition and poverty while he provided financially for his adoption. He enabled Micah David's referral to be the LAST baby referral before 6 weeks of drought, through which I am not sure we would have survived.

Most of all, He is bringing Micah David into a house of love because He first loved us.

So, this is our reality check. God is in control, we are not. Good thing.

Kim

UPDATE CENTRAL!

GOD IS SO GOOD!!! (He was good before the update too...I'm a Calvinist ;0)

So, we finally received an update on Micah! Hooray! Just in time too as Chad noted last night that I was beginning to "obsess" about his weight and lack of chub (if you'd seen Devon at Micah's age, you'd know why. Devon was one big roll, Micah is on the tiny side with no rolls to speak of).


Here's what it said:

EATING

Micah is on Nan-1 formula which is for children under 6 months. The babies are fed every 2-3 hours.

SLEEPING

Micah is a good sleeper, and wakes twice during the night for a
bottle. He sleeps off and on during the day.

SOCIAL

Micah is a quiet and content baby.

APPEARANCE/DEVELOPMENT

Micah has beautiful dark brown skin. He looks like a different baby (in a good way) from when we first got him. He has gained a lot of weight and is gaining personality as well.

MEDICAL/SPECIAL NEEDS
Micah has not dealt with any serious sickness since he first came to the TH, other than being malnourished. We are very happy with his progress.

HOORAY FOR MICAH!! He has DOUBLED his weight (can't give exact numbers but he's still not on the charts) since coming to the transitional home. I can't wait to hear that he has developed even more personality!

We also got the CUTEST picture of him, which I can't show you (bummer for you all, he really is gorgeous). The great thing is that he's NOT WEARING PINK! Rather, he's wearing a zebra print outfit which is really sweet but still kind of girlie.

We are counting down the days until our court date (we are guessing that its the last week in November/December 1st time frame). This little boy is SO LOVED already!

Ignorance is NOT BLISS!!!!

I awoke today with such anticipation! Today the Terwilligers are holding Micah, praying over him, giving him gifts from us, his waiting family. (I checked their blog, nothing to report yet.) I am so excited to see him in BLUE!

But now, I am intensely jealous! I am happy to have the connection to him, but want to scream "Put down my baby! You can't hold him first, I'm his mother!!!" Then I think "No, hold him, kiss him, love on him for me!" Needless to say I feel a bit bipolar!

We are both struggling W~A~I~T~I~N~G!

It's so hard to push forward with your eyes on the prize when
you just want to bury your head in the sand. This is what I read this
morning, a word of encouragement from the author of Adoption!

"I took you from the ends of the earth, from its farthest corners I
called you. I said 'You are my servant' I have chosen you and have not
rejected you. So, do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed
for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold
you with my righteousness." Isaiah 41: 8-10

Our father is upholding us. He has chosen us and called our
children from afar. He promises to strengthen us if we ask!


Father, strengthen us as we wait for the child you have
chosen for us. This wait is SO HARD! We don't see with your eyes or
think with your thoughts. Help us to lean on you as you uphold us, not
fight against you. Give us the strength and trust we need to get
through this day. THANK YOU for choosing us, God of old. We praise you
for promising to never leave us, for giving us so many reasons not to
fear. Thank you, Father for our children, some known, some unknown.
Strengthen them as they wait to be united with us. Bind our hearts
together and uphold us.

Amen

Pictures, Pictures, Pictures, Pictures!

Hey All~

We finally received a few new photos of Micah today! The lovely Schmidt family who traveled to pick up gorgeous Benaiah took 4 photos of Micah. He looks so sweet and happy!

Two were up close (we can even see a Caucasian hand rubbing his belly) and 2 were with his precious Nanny. She is beautiful and we are already praying for her and thinking of the most thoughtful gifts to bring her. It is evident in the picture that she loves him. I long for and dread the day he must say goodbye to his current "Mommy" because is forever Mommy has come to bring him home.

Micah is wearing the sweetest little outfit, a white onesie with pink piping and pants with pink, yellow, orange, and green animals. He does look good in pink! I look forward to seeing pictures of him in the outfit we got him next week when the Terwilliger's take his care package to him! We've only ever seen him in pink and white. I'm so ready to see him in blue!

Micah looks happy, healthy, and well cared for in all of the pictures. He even has rubber band wrists like Devon did when he was a chub! This knowledge gives us so much peace.

We are looking forward to receiving more pictures in a few days from the other returning families!

Kim